Author Archives: bingobangoman

Ref Causes Fumble By Hitting Ball With Flag

The life of a referee isn’t an easy one. You have to always be on your toes because even the smallest mistake can disrupt the flow of a game and get the fans in attendance throwing their shoes at you. One ref at last week’s Cardinals-Jaguars game found that out the hard way, as he […]

B.B. King Estate Denies Testicle Claims In Biography

Legendary bluesman Riley “B.B.” King was one of the most influential guitar players ever to live, a master of smooth, silky playing that introduced a level of virtuosity to the genre and inspired thousands of acolytes. But his estate is up in arms about a new biography that claims the musician was left infertile as […]

Man Gets 12 Years In Prison For Cabin Castration

This is a tale straight out of a horror movie, but it happened in Oklahoma. The case involves a 28-year-old man who was seeking gender reassignment surgery but wasn’t willing or able to pursue traditional medical channels. Instead, he found his way to an underground Web forum called Eunuch Maker and wound up getting his […]

This Guy Ejaculated Out Of His Butthole For Two Years

We’ve written about some pretty insane medical stuff in our tenure at the Ball Report, but every so often something comes over the wire that flabbergasts even us. Case in point: a patient written up in the journal Cureus who had been ejaculating out of his butthole for two years before seeking medical attention. The […]

To Save Ocelots, Texas Mails Testicles To Ohio

Preserving endangered animals should be a priority for humankind as we take over more and more of the planet, and scientists are doing their best to maintain vulnerable populations as well as they can. One example are the ocelots of Texas, a population that now numbers less than 100 cats. The last remaining wild group […]

Officer Charged With Tasering Man In Testicles

Police brutality has been a hot topic in the world for the last few years, but things don’t really seem to be changing all that much despite all the protesting. Case in point: an officer in Phoenix, Arizona who is facing charges of Tasering a man right in the groin with his stun gun. Glendale […]

Sex-Mad Chihuahua Needs Balls Removed To Survive

Handling arousal is tough for males of many different species, but for Colchester Chihuahua Milo, it’s legitimately threatening his life. The one year old dog gets so worked up when he meets a lady that he humps so much that it injures him. He’s already had two vet visits to repair damage done to his […]

Walk Ball Is The New TikTok Craze

Video streaming app TikTok is all about trends and challenges, as the horde of teens using it seek out the hottest things to copy. But the latest trend sweeping the network comes from college football locker rooms, where players are engaging in the absurdist game of “walk ball.” What the hell is “walk ball?” Well, […]

Nicki Minaj Spreads Vaccine Testicle Misinformation

One of the biggest obstacles to ending the COVID-19 pandemic has been vaccine misinformation, with hucksters, scam artists and politicians arguing against the well-tested and effective solution and in favor of horse paste or just hoping it goes away on its own. Now multi-platinum rapper Nicki Minaj has gotten in on the act, alleging that […]

Texas Still Loves Fried Bull Testicles

When you write about balls for as long as we have, you’re going to cover the culinary side of testicles soon enough. We’ve posted about the myriad testicle festivals in cities around the United States, where people gather to chow down on bull balls and enjoy live music and entertainment. But in the great state […]

Strange Stone Balls Found In Scottish Tomb

Our ancient ancestors had a number of hobbies that they spent time doing in between hunting and gathering, and one of the most mysterious is the creation of smooth, polished stone balls for an unknown purpose. Now a new archaeological dig in Scotland’s Orkney Islands has turned up two of them in a tomb, lending […]

18 Year Old Fighting Testicular Cancer

Battling testicular cancer is rough no matter what your situation is, but being a teenage son of a single mother is even more stressful. Isaac Trevino’s entire family was diagnosed with COVID-19 on July 21. They quarantined and took it easy and thankfully the disease didn’t hit them terribly hard – except for Isaac. As […]

Television Employee Talks About Scrotum Harassment

Workplace harassment can be a huge problem, as this story from an employee of the Indonesian Broadcast Commission (KPI) reveals. His story goes far beyond verbal jabs and missed opportunities, as at one point he was pinned down while his cohorts stripped him from the waist and drew on his ballsack with a permanent marker. […]

Canadian Politician Teaches You Testicle Breathing

Politics is a wild world where people from lots of different backgrounds come together to try and represent their community. Some of those people are business owners or other professionals. Some are civic leaders or community organizers. And some are guys who want to teach you testicle breathing and encourage you to conserve your semen. […]

Woman Invents Ultrasound Powered Male Contraceptive

The quest for a male contraceptive solution that is non-invasive and doesn’t reduce sexual stimulation has been a long one, with women traditionally being forced to carry the brunt of the burden of birth control. But a new device from a German designer might provide a new approach to the issue by using ultrasound to […]

Man Gets Balls Stuck In Padlock

We’re not of the mentality to kink-shame anyone here at the Ball Report – as long as what you’re doing is consensual and safe, get your rocks off in any way that’s good for you. But if you wind up like the Sussex man who reported to the hospital after having a padlock clamped over […]

This Bizarre Civil War Story Will Hit You In The Balls

Let’s venture back into history for a testicular tale that seems too bizarre to be true, but a lot of wild stuff happened in the days of the Civil War. The story is passed down second-hand by a columnist for a local newspaper, who says they read it from Mississippi historian and author Gordon A. […]

11 Year Old Boy In Indonesia Impales Scrotum On Stick

It pains us to report these things, but anywhere in the world that testicles are getting injured, the Ball Report must be there. Today we travel to Indonesia to share the extremely grim tale of a young boy who fell out of a tree and wound up with a stick poked right through his scrotum. […]

Man Tries To Smuggle Mushrooms Into Jail Behind His Ballsack

When you’re facing jail time, you want to find ways to make your sentence more interesting. But for Benny Gaona, who was heading into an Albuquerque jail on an outstanding warrant for driving with a suspended license, his plan to bring some psychedelic mushrooms and other contraband ended up backfiring after a body scan revealed […]

Golfer Renato Paratore Hits Ball Into Spectator’s Bag

Known colloquially as the “fastest man in professional golf,” Renato Paratore obtained his qualifying card for the European Tour at only 17 and has been a reliable middle-pack finisher throughout his pro career. His most notable achievement is probably winning the Betfred British Masters in 2020. That is, until last week when he managed to […]

Scrotum Frogs Come To London Zoo

Here at the Ball Report, we obviously believe that every ballsack is beautiful and should be cherished. But it’s testing every inch of that dedication to say nice things about the South American scrotum frogs, dubbed such because the wrinkly folds of skin that they use to absorb oxygen from the water make them look […]

Cricket Player Hit In The Crotch Twice In A Row

No matter what sport you’re playing, there’s always the potential to take a shot to the crotch. But one of the worst projectiles to wing at your nutsack has to be a cricket ball. They’re small and hard and can work up some serious speed. And the only thing worse than taking one cricket ball […]

Man With Testicular Cancer Does Creative Haircuts

One of the many little things that testicular cancer patients have to deal with is chemotherapy-induced hair loss. For men especially with the specter of balding just around the corner as they age, it can be a very difficult decision to lose their flowing locks. But for Canadian man Joseph Barnes, he took it as […]

The Gathering Of The Juggalos Had A Soberbawls Group

The Gathering of the Juggalos is widely viewed as one of the most debauched parties in America, where fans of the Insane Clown Posse congregate in a rural area typically at the butt end of nowhere to listen to their favorite Psychopathic Records acts, watch wrestling, sideshows and other entertainments, and consume massive amounts of […]

Woman Arrested In Spain For Kicking Cop In The Balls

When you get into an altercation with law enforcement, the smart money is on calmly and patiently complying with their instructions. But people don’t always bet on the smart money, as is the case of a woman in Spain who made an arrest significantly worse. When the 23 year old woman in Valencia was reported […]

Hanes Has A New Underwear For “Ball-Ance”

We’ve written on here before about how styles in men’s underwear haven’t changed all that much since the debut of the boxer brief in the mid-1990s. With massive advances in technology and human understanding of our anatomy, it seems somewhat odd that we haven’t seen similar progress in keeping our private parts comfortable. But venerable […]

This Startup Is Promising You Bigger Balls

We covered the probiotic Lactobacillus reuteri a little while ago on the Ball Report, as people believe that ingesting it on the regular could increase testicular volume and functionality. But now a new startup is going all in on the bacteria, selling it as a way for men insecure about their downstairs to beef up […]

Watch This Red Panda Discover A Ball Pit

There are few animals quite as cute as the red panda. Native to southwestern China and the Himalayas, this charming omnivore is about the size of a house cat with short legs and a waddling gait. They’re largely solitary and sedentary during the day, but that doesn’t mean they don’t like to have a good […]

Weed Swallow And Testicle Grab Leads To Police Beating

Swallowing the evidence is one of the most time-tested ways to try and flummox the cops, but in the case of Morgan Culshaw, things got wildly out of control after a police chase led to him getting racked in the balls and going wild on police. Culshaw was driving down the M40 at dangerous speeds […]

Vaccine Conspiracy Theorists Believe Their Sperm Is The Next Bitcoin

The pushback to the COVID-19 vaccine has been unbelievable, as a subset of Americans are so willing to keep living in a pandemic that has killed nearly a million people in this country that they make up endless conspiracy theories to justify their decisions. The latest one is that, somehow, the vaccine will be sterilizing […]