Evil Baseball Bat’s Plot Foiled By Reflexive Hero

There’s nothing more enjoyable than watching an adult snatch a foul ball or home run away from a kid at a baseball game. To that kid, catching a foul ball would mean everything. He’d probably remember it for the rest of his life. The adult, on the other hand, is most likely drunk. He could just as easily be a general sports fan as a diehard local team booster. He’s there because it’s the weekend. That’s all it is to him, a diversion.

But something happens inside him when that ball comes over the wall. A switch flips. A flame is lit. He wants the damn ball, and no 6th grader is gonna stand in his way. His superior strength and reflexes make this a routine procedure. The ball is won, and the boy is crushed forever.

On the other hand, saving a kid from what seriously could have been a devastating and permanent injury uses the same instincts to opposite effect. Instead of boos, this recreational hero and Chipper Jones lookalike is showered with cheers. He won’t get to take the baseball bat home, presumably. But we very much doubt that the kid wanted to put it on his mantle, either.

Put some nets up, MLB! Good lord.