From the Pixar Vault: Mike’s New Groin

This short film is almost definitely a student project, so it is probably pretty unfair to criticize it too much. But man is it terrible! The student needs to know that it is bad.

First of all, “Mike’s New Groin” appears to be a re-dub of a Pixar short featuring the beloved characters of Mike Wazowski and James P. Sullivan. As far as we can tell, despite not having seen the film in its unedited form, the sole piece of original dialogue is a reference to Mike’s penis, or rather his propensity for showing it to his friend and co-worker. (Friendly reminder: these films are for children, and Wazowski is a small, green orb whose torso is as smooth as a volleyball.)

Besides that, there’s not exactly a treasure trove of terrific audio here. The mixing is very uneven, making dialogue difficult to understand and music impossible to appreciate. Whoever does the Billy Crystal (Mike) impersonation is in the ballpark at least, but the John Goodman (Sully) is off the charts in its wrongness. Who knows if accuracy was the goal here, but unless it was to make the audience think about a monster’s penis, then “Mike’s New Groin” deserves an F+.