“F*cking Matt Damon” Crashes Governor’s Ball

Let’s face it. Put simply, none of us knows what a “Governor’s Ball” is. Not a single one of us. A party, perhaps. Or an awards show. It’s definitely not the Oscars, because those just happened and we remember that. The Golden Globes is a separate thing, we think. Music stuff, like the Grammys, is out. As are the Tony Awards — that’s for the theater. Not movie theaters…the other kind. It could be the SAG-AFTRA awards, which are like the bargain bin Academy Awards (another word for Oscars, probably). But we’re really not sure. A Governor’s Ball sounds like one of those things that James Bond goes to, just so he can put on a tux and seduce a sexy rich lady. Or, barring that, some kind of European exercise fad.

Either way, this is a fun little update to what most of the entertainment media thinks is the first ever viral video. What have all these crazy kids up to? Well, let’s see. Matt Damon has been tortured on distant planets twice. Jimmy Kimmel has continued to do his talk show very adequately, but nevertheless has been surpassed by a cavalcade of millennial-courting variety show dorks. Sarah Silverman…good golly, who knows? She gave a characteristically “over the room’s head” performance at the Oscars (which is not a Governor’s Ball), and that was fine. But the ol’ IMDB is lookin’ a little sparse these days. Maybe “And Punching The Clown” will be good!

At least she’s not F*cking Ben Affleck! That, we presume, will be up to Henry Cavill.